The Ten Most Perplexing Looks from New York Fashion Week

by - Sunday, September 15, 2013

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Jonathon Saunders, stop watching Drive.
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How many cookies do you think I could hide in this Mary Katrantzou dress? Also, what happens to the dress if the girl has nunjas?
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I know these outfits are supposed to be fantastic/ not streetwear, but I am really hoping this means that in Spring 2014 there will be lots of garden parties with cape themes. Thank you L'Wren Scott.

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So many things! The leather floor mat top! The way all the divots pointing up to her totally miserable face! The Sandals!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Good lord the Sandals!!! Does this mean those are coming in? Ok, JW Anderson, this whole look is really special.

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Now I know that fashion is supposed to be cyclical, but I am almost positive I had this Suno dress when I was in first grade. But I had better shoes, because at least they lit up. For serious, fashion gods, do us all a favor and don't bring these clunky ugly momsandals back. No one needs that business.
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First of all, I would really like to retire neons. DKNY, are you listening? Neon only looks good on really tan people, and nobody needs skin cancer so they can wear an ugly swimsuit backwards. It is a glamorous swimming gown.
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Rodarte, for the 90's rapper, biker gang member, cowgirl in you. Or something. It really is impossible to guess what we are supposed to be going for here, but maybe that means they have succeeded.
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Rodarte, also for incredibly depressed flamenco dancers. Perhaps sad they haven't met their true love Beetlejuice? And again, what happens if someone with boobs wears this? If I wore this, you could hide small animals under those teepees (among other problems).

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Also, DKNY, who needs a suit for the beach? Or a suit that rides so low that you can see the bottom end of someone's underpants? Or anything like any of this ever? Major fail.

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Coffee filters? Dryer Sheets? Electrical tape? Kudos to J W Anderson for recycling. Also, SHOES. Why are these shoes coming for us? Please, everyone, fight this machine!


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